Secrets That Happy People Know
Now that the holidays are over and the New Year begins, many of us may feel a sense of loss and unhappiness about our life in retrospect. Especially those on the path of personal and spiritual growth have a tendency to analyze their unhappiness in order to find the causes and make improvements. But it is just as important, if not more so, to analyze your definition of happiness.
Happiness is intangible; it is a fleeting moment in time that you cannot save for later. It actually has been scientifically studied and the results are that you believe your personal happiness comes through a self-report of your own definition of what happiness is and whatever that X stimulus may be. To make things clearer, the opposite of happiness is not unhappiness.
Unhappiness serves as a valuable resolve of growth but the opposite of happiness is apathy, which is the loss of joy we feel moving toward our potential. That is where depression sets in and is confused with being unhappy.
When we take the time to recognize when we are happy and what that feels like, it becomes easier to recreate. We can examine how joy feels in our bodies and what thoughts run through our minds in times of bliss. Once we know what it feels like and can identify some of the triggers and are aware of our actions, we can recreate that happiness when we are feeling low.
Knowing that like attracts like, we can pull ourselves out of a blue mood by focusing on joyful moments. We might find that forcing ourselves to be giving and forgiving, even when it doesn’t seem to come naturally, helps us to reconnect with the joy before the negative action or thought happened.
If we can identify a song, a picture or a pet as a happiness trigger, we can also use them as tools to recapture joy if we are having trouble finding it. Here are some simple basic habits of people who consider themselves to be happy with who they are and their lives.
Habits of happy people
- You must have strong social relationships. You spend enjoyable time with friends, family and acquaintances. It is a common deathbed declaration of regret of not spending more time with the people you love.
- Do more, not less of what you enjoy and are good at. These are called ‘signature strengths’ and what you are uniquely talented at. It brings you joy and you feel good about yourself when you paint, knit, exercise, write, cook or whatever. No matter how busy you are, if you take time out to do what you enjoy, then you won’t feel rushed or pressured every moment of the day.
- Do not stay in a job you hate! You spend one third of your day or more getting ready for, arriving and working. If you hate your job, that one third will vomit all over the remaining two thirds of your day. Do whatever you have to make a job change with asking for divine assistance, prayer, daily affirmations, a job grocery list and visualization and then go for it. And don’t bring the dissatisfaction of the old job with you.
- Plan your happiness. Make a point of scheduling the things that make you happy. An interesting observation made by researchers is that there is often a gap between where people say they want to spend their time and how they actually spend their time. Put what you want to do on your calendar, you will be more likely to follow through with it.
- Happiness in the moment is not everything. Yep! After giving you these tips on what happy people know, this is the most important one. Happiness is mainly about getting what one wants and needs, including from other people or even just by using money. In contrast, meaningfulness brings real feelings of joy that is linked to doing things that express self love and in particular to doing positive things for others.
Susan Z’s Verdict
Running marathons are painful but completing them is awesome. Studying is boring but having a degree feels great! Happy people understand and know that life is not always about immediate self-gratification but creating a sense of accomplishment within oneself, not from outside yourself.
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